ex libris

The Idiot, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
translated by Pevear & Volokhonsky

finished August 10, 2025
It's incredibly disappointing that I didn't like this book as much as I thought I would. The most fascinating characters are that of Prince Myshkin himself, Rogozhin, and Nastasya Filippovna, but after Part One there is very few scenes of them together until the very end. In part to my thoughts about the story, which I would probably give another chance (as I believe every Dostoyevsky book should be read at least twice) is the P&V translation which dulls in comparison to Eva Martin's, whose translation is free to access on Project Gutenberg. I was initially reluctant to read anything translated by P&V and decided to give them a chance on this one. Should I revisit this in the future, it will be with a different translator.

Bluets, Maggie Nelson

finished July 17, 2025
This was recommended to me by an acquaintance. I'm very fond of essays and adjacent styles, and this one was a rather quick read for me. I ought to read more books that ruminate on colours. I might read this book again in the future so I can spend more time taking in each passage.

Conclave, Robert Harris

finished June 24, 2025
I read this not too long after I finished watching Conclave for the first time. It's my belief that both the book and the movie should be consumed together. Do Not Separate. But I do love Pinoy Benitez and I wish he made it into the movie.

The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt

finished June 1, 2025
It took me an awfully long time to finish this book, but only because I kept piling more books on top to the point where I eventually put this one on the back burner. I really liked this one, but I think I liked it less than I thought I would. I really wanted to love it to the point of obsession. Alas. Theo is such a fascinating and fucked up character who is outwardly trying to appear normal. And Boris! God, Boris, his other half, and he just rolls with the punches. Honestly, had I read this book when I was 16 or 17, it would've changed my life.

The Count of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
translated by Robin Buss

I remember specifically that it took me nine months to finish this book, in part due to the fact that I was still in college and found little time to read. It was the most wonderful on-and-off nine months I've had the pleasure of reading. It is a whirlwind of romantic and familial drama, about faith and revenge. There will never be a film or series of TCOMC that can capture the ridiculousness that is Monte Cristo's character. I always tell people that this book sets up a lot of things, but the pay-off is always worth it. I plan to reread this at some point because I want to document everything in chronological order through a spreadsheet.

The Brothers Karamazov, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
translated by David McDuff

The original copy I read was from the library and I finished it in under three weeks. This is always the book I recommend people read first to get into Dostoyevsky (even before Crime and Punishment) because it's his magnum opus and, quite frankly, possibly the easiest book to get through in terms of understanding the plot. There are just enough characters that it doesn't feel overcrowded nor too sparse. There is a quality about Dostoyevsky's writing in TBK that gives you a sense of hope for the future.

No Longer Human, Osamu Dazai
translated by Donald Keene

I read this book when I was in high school (about 5-6 years now) when I was incredibly suicidal and felt completely alone in all my feelings. Reading this book was a pivotal point in my life where, perhaps ironically enough, I found comfort in knowing that I was not alone after all. This deep sense of alienation and feeling quite literally like I was not human was mirrored back to me through the pages and though it didn't heal me, just knowing that an author a long time ago managed to eloquently put the pain into words put me at strange ease. I haven't reread it since graduating high school, and I've thought about it, but I'm in an incredibly different headspace than I was when I was a teenager. If I did reread it, I fear that I might rate it differently. I'm keeping this here because I still remember this like a warm hug.

Books

The Idiot, Fyodor Dostoyevsky translated by Pevear & Volokhonsky